Things I realized the hard way this week

Things I realized the hard way this week:

1. Doctors don't know everything.
2. More of something isn't necessarily better.

My GP gave me a prescription for metformin, a medication that helps control blood sugar. She had me start at the low dose--500 mg once a day. A week later, I was to increase the dosage to 1000 mg. A week after that, the dose goes to 1,500 mg. A week after that increase, I'd top off at 2,000 mg a day.

That's a lot of medicine for someone who's in the early stages of diabetes. I asked my doc if I should check my blood sugar so I could see how the med was affecting it. "Nope," said she. "You'll be fine."

Hmmm. Well, I felt okay until I hit the 1,500 mg mark, and then my back started to hurt. It took a couple of days of pain and discomfort before it hit me: my kidneys were hurting. I knew that the med is metabolized through the kidneys, so I got on the phone with the doc's office. The alarm in the nurse's voice told me what I suspected: the dose was too high for my body to process. She told me to back down to 1,000 mg a day, and now I have to go in on Monday to have kidney function tests run.

Jimminy. If I've screwed up my kidneys, I'm going to be PISSED.

3. I'm not MBA material.

I started grad school again, this time to get an MBA in human resource management. I really don't want an MBA, but I've been told by folks at work that it will make me more 'competitive.'

Hmmm. Okay. Well, I'm on class number 2, and I'm ready to claw my own eyes out. It's not that the coursework is particularly difficult or boring. I just don't want an MBA. My heart isn't in it. And I don't really see the point in going after the MBA to get a promotion that I have slim chances of getting because (a) I don't have a willie, and (b) I don't have an engineering degree. The Good Ol' Boys' Network is alive and well in the federal gummint, and where I work, if you're not an engineer, you're pond scum. So why am I doing this?

If I'm going to put my finite amount of time and energy into another degree, I'd rather direct that energy towards something that sets me on fire: tech writing, literature, psychology, library science. I guess I'm really not that interested in competing with The Big Boys. Glad I realized this early in the program.

4. I really need to have more fun.

I've decided to buy myself a bicycle. I loved bike riding as a kid. It's an outdoor activity that won't kill my knees or my crabby back. Even though it will soon be hot and muggy here, I can generate a semi-decent breeze on a bike. That's my plan.

I'm researching local hiking trails. I found out that there are some nifty trails around our local beaches. It's good exercise, plus there's that fresh air factor.

5. There's nothing wrong with being lazy.

There were a couple of days this week when I felt like having myself committed. Between perimenopause symptoms, the damn depression, and the medication/kidney problems, I've been feeling like I was going to crawl out of my own skin. So instead of forcing myself to do the stiff-upper-lip, keep-on-keepin'-on thing, I've been sitting outside on our back deck for an hour or so each afternoon. A good book, birdsong, sunlight, soft breezes, and the occasional cursing of a feisty squirrel have done wonders for me. It's a shame it took me this long to figure out that pretending that I don't feel crappy doesn't do me any good. Sometimes you just need to slow down and chill.

Thank God Friday is around the corner. Can I get an amen from my sistahs? ;)